Protecting my rear

There's a reason I don't back into parking spaces. This is what happens when you try to back into a parking space in your parking garage at work while lining your car up with the jeep (i.e. no back end) next to you. Ooops!

My submission to FAIL blog

I spent two hours at the dogpark before realizing I was wearing two different shoes.

Teaching your child to suck on a straw:

also known as Starting him early
also known as There's only whipped cream in there
also known as All it takes is some whipped cream to teach a one-year-old to suck through a straw instead of chewing on it.

Freak accident, emphasis on the freak (because that's how I looked)

We've been bike riding almost every day for the past couple weeks. Yes, there are bugs, and yes, they often get in my eyes, hit my forehead, and one got up Christen's nose. These are generally gnats and mosquitoes, which turn to goo in your eyes. Gross, but not painful.

Saturday night we were riding home from a particularly long bike ride and were about a mile out when a bug hit my eye. Not a gnat. Not a mosquito. I don't know what this bug was, but it had a hard, green little body and got stuck in my left eye with my contact. Pain!!!! It's a good thing I was going over a small bridge, because we were next to a major highway and I may have jerked the bike into oncoming traffic. I couldn't get the bug out and he refused to turn to goo, so I had to ride home with one eye.

When I got home, I got the bug out and my eye looked like this: I put some drops in it and hoped for the best. It was bloodshot and painful, but I thought it would be okay. It was a good ride, otherwise.

A half hour later it looked like this: my eyeball itself had swollen around my contact, making it very difficult to get out. My eye had also swollen and was all very tender. I was afraid for a black eye. I fished out my contact and tried to ignore it.

Sunday morning it was a little weepy, so it was stuck closed. It was like I had pink eye! I stopped taking pictures, and we rode to the gym to work out for awhile (and I hoped that no one thought I had pink eye while I was there). I figured if the swelling didn't go down by Monday, I'd see an eye doctor.

Thankfully, Monday it was better. Still a little red and tender but making progress. The swelling went down. That's a plus. Today I'm still wearing my glasses (which reminds me that I desperately need new glasses) and the eye itself is still slightly red, but getting better daily so I haven't seen a doctor.

Self preservation, airplane style

I've been making a concentrated effort to be less of a bitch lately. Ha, I know, right? Well, I'm generally not a bitch. For some reason, though, I get in these moods and I attempt to sabotage my relationship with my other half and I get bitchy. I know I do this. I did it to my ex, and easily ended 3 years with him. Toward the end of that relationship I always felt like I was the worst version of myself around him. I couldn't control myself. I've never had great self esteem, and I never felt that he adored me enough (which, by the way, he didn't). When I get self conscious, I lash out. If I could have controlled myself then, who knows if that relationship would have lasted longer. It wasn't healthy in many other ways, and I wouldn't have found my husband if we hadn't broken it off. So I'm glad for it.

Now, I know what I'm doing. We've been together for six years, married for two. Every once in awhile I get to be a big pain in the butt. Everything he does pisses me off. I've mentioned this change to him, and he doesn't seem to notice it (he must have trained himself to ignore it). But since I notice it, I'm trying very hard not to let every stupid thing he does bother me. It makes me a nicer person. I like being a nicer person.

Glad I don't do this every weekend

How do those who drink every weekend keep it up? I have a glass of wine or two every once in awhile, but I don't go all-out drinking .... um, ever. Even when I get a little tipsy, it's not all-out. And I've never had a hangover.I know you want to kill me now. :)

But Friday night we went over a friend's house for poker. We brought Spencer too so he could mingle for a little bit and slept in his playpen in the computer room (side note: he was awesome sleeping at someone else's house. I had faith that he would fall asleep eventually, but he never even cried. He was perfect. I love my amazing son.).

I had such a good time! We played Texas Hold 'Em (blah, but people have a strange fascination with that game), and Bullshit (which made me laugh so hard my face hurt) and then some drinking-related card game that I don't know what it was called (maybe ring of death?) but helped get me even more trashed. I started pouring other people's drinks into my glass when I ran out. Thank god I'm not an obnoxious drunk (as far as I know ...)

Saturday morning was a little rough. I felt fine when I got up; I drank a couple glasses of Crystal Light to keep myself hydrated and cooked up some eggs for breakfast. Halfway through the cooking I started feeling ... bad. Seriously bad. I powered through the rest of the cooking and then collapsed on the couch for two hours of Psych and Monk while Christen took over the rest of the, um, moving. He made me some coffee, and two cups later I was feeling closer to myself. Thank God I don't do that all the time.

A Lack of Political Humor (ramble, please disregard)

Warning for ahead: I'm diplomatic about my politics and my religion, possibly to a fault. There's a reason I rarely post on such things. I'm leaving my comments on, but please save the rants against either side and please post thought-provoking instead of riot-inciting comments only ... thanks in advance).

I have a friend who is a die-hard Conservative. He's far more polarized than I'm generally comfortable (I've always said that people that are too far left or right scare me; I'm a true moderate. Otherwise I'm known as a fiscal conservative (with some exceptions) and a social liberal (with some exceptions)). However, he's an old, good friend and I do respect his opinion. My problem is this: He is so bitter about Obama that he complains about every step he makes. Daily complaints. I might be naive (I'm not counting it out) but I don't remember the complaints about Bush every step during the first months of office. I know that there was debate on whether he actually deserved it because of the craziness that happened at the time of the election, and I know that there was certainly bitterness at the start of his second term but I don't believe that there were complaints two months in about how he was ruining the country. Maybe I'm wrong.

A few months ago a flame war erupted on another friend's Facebook page because he had mentioned his allegiance to the President, and other friends of his had started a bitter (sorry I'm out of adjectives) fight over whether he was one Republican's president or not "he's not my president, blah blah blah" etc. I am likely the eternal optimist here; I think it will be hard but I believe that the steps being taken at this time are for the good of the country. I have to believe that this spiral has an end, and that we as a country will climb out of the hole that we have dug for ourselves. It will surely not be without sacrifice.

I think the point of my rambling here, is stop complaining if you aren't doing anything. Try giving him a chance. As Bush himself said (from Jack Tapper:

“I'm not going to spend my time criticising him. There's plenty of critics in the arena. I think it's time for the ex-president to tap dance off the stage and let the current president have a go at solving the world's problems,” the former president said in remarks to business executives. “He deserves my silence. And if he wants my help, he can pick up the phone.”

...The speech today was Bush's first since leaving office in January. The event was organized by the Calgary Chamber of Commerce and his remarks to business executives were closed to the press and the tickets were invitation only.

The former president said he wants President Obama to succeed. “I love my country a lot more than I love politics. I think it is essential that he be helped in the office.”

I think it's a very noble position to take, and although I've never cared for him politically, I respect former President Bush much more personally given his obvious graciousness. It's possible that he only takes the high road because he has other more outspoken allies already railing against Obama, but either way, I'm impressed.