Friday Five

I’m OFF today! (does a little happy dance!) Of course, there was a work thing that had to be scheduled today and couldn’t be scheduled for a different day so I’ve got my phone about me in case. Blargh. It’s always the way, right?

-  So on my list of things to do is that I want to get all my expected house chores that I want done, DONE. In the morning, before I have a change to sit down and do nothing. I want to run laundry, clean my bedroom and bathroom and reorganize my shoes. And clean the kitchen. This honestly shouldn’t take long but it will be nice to have it done before the weekend.

- Then I also have on my list to go to a movie, but I’m still deciding what that should be. I want to see Star Wars but C wants to see it again too (he already saw it with the boys. Would it be fair to wait? Will I get screwed? Or should I see Joy or The Big Short or The Danish Girl or any other of the movies I hadn’t heard of until the Golden Globes. I wish there was a good romantic comedy out. I love them and C doesn’t, and it’s the perfect thing for me to watch on my own.

-   It was a bad week for deaths in entertainment. And really, a bad last 30 days.

-   Two weeks into Whole 30 and I’ve lost 7.8 pounds. It hasn’t been completely clean but I’m working at it. Last night I honest to God cheated in a hurried hormonal mess. I felt terrible about it but I'm going to keep going.

- I missed the last season of Downton Abbey and I haven't watched this one yet, so I started rewatching the first four seasons over the last week. I stayed up late last night to finish the fourth and now I'm starting on new content for me. I'm not good with new content - I watch so little actual television (even though actually I'd like to watch! I just lose time somehow!) and I'm afraid of it, somehow. I don't know how to explain. I don't want to get hooked and miss something. I don't want to get too tied to the characters. I ... oh I don't know. I'm enjoying it though.

A good little martyr

My feelings about food have gone up and down this week and I’m pretty sure it’s hormonal. I’ve stayed 96% true to the Whole30 diet, except I did lick the spoon after giving my kids the last of my favorite ice cream so it wouldn’t tempt me and last night I ate three m&ms. You aren’t going to tell on me, right?

I’ve worked out when I could and when I wasn’t feeling down too down, but I also allowed myself sometimes just to feel down and not do anything that needed me out of my chicken lounge pants. All my meals have been compliant, all my snacks, and I’ve fed all the good carbs to my kids.

My dinner last night:

My kids’ dinner last night:

Don’t get me wrong, my Italian wedding soup was fantastic (I loosely followed this recipe) and I brought it for lunch today too. However, look at all of that beautiful fake cheese and macaroni.

(I’m also right this very minute sitting 10 feet from a giant bag of bagels that my manager brought in and 40 feet from three bins of various candies at the office assistant’s desk. The fact that I’m not stuffing my face with all of it is a genuine miracle.)

Free time.

So I went to ask off for a day next week and realized I’m maxed on vacation, so on top of the one day next week, I’m also taking this Friday off and an entire week in February.  All of these days off are by myself. Does that seem excessive? I have no plans, although there are a lot of things I feel like I should do. I don’t know if it’s a woman v man thing or just a me v my husband thing, but if C was to have the day off to himself, he would play video games all day. This is not an exaggeration, and it’s not a judgment of him either – I don’t mind that he plays video games (except when I walk in and have to ask him if he’s in battle or how long until I can get more than grunted answers from him).

It’s more a judgment of me. When I’m off, I feel like I should be cleaning the house, doing laundry, cleaning out the garage, scrubbing showers. Why do I do these things to myself?

So anyhow. I’m trying to decide what to do with myself for these days off. I might go see a movie by myself (would you see Joy? The Big Short?) or spend some of our Macy’s credit on a new wallet. Go for a very long walk and not worry about time (if it warms up). Buy cat food (darn it, adding in errands again).

On the first day of my week-long vacation it is Spencer’s birthday, and while he’s going to be going to school I think I might take him McDonald’s and have lunch with him (I’ve never done this before and it feels daunting somehow) but the rest of the week is completely free. Should I volunteer at the school? Get a massage? Make a chiro appointment/dentist appointment/dermatology appointment?

I’m not good at downtime or free time or time for me. Someone come spend time with me not doing errands. Please.

Friday five

The name Friday Five isn't new or groundbreaking or even mine - I've seen it all over the internets (I should probably google who to give credit to even though I don't read them right?) but I've struggled to find a Friday groove ever since I stopped doing seven things or whatever that was way back when (and I'm still a little sad about Chelsea not doing her Ten on Tuesday lists, TBH) so FIVE. I can do five, right?

1. Today is the seventh day of my January plan. I ... have lost 5 lbs. I have logged 14.5 miles run and walked, worked out five times separate from runs and walks, drank holy cow ounces of water (approx 80-100 ounces a day). I have not cheated on no dairy/no alcohol/no sugar/no grains. Not once. I also haven't had any beans and the only soy I had was a scoop of miso in my sauteed veggies one dinner. I had one hard moment (of three hours) one day where I really really wanted some damn m&ms, but I got through it. I'm currently blogging from an airport where I'm eating a steak salad (sadly with no cheese) and drinking Pellegrino and this life is not half bad. I can do this. FIVE POUNDS, GUYS.
2. There was a kid that just wheeled by me on those wheelie shoes and holy hell, I hate those things.
3. We are allowing our Disney passes to expire and I'm kind of sad about this. I'm having second thoughts. I know it's the right thing to do, we have other expenses we need to think about and other parks we can go to when we get the itch for theme parks but Disney has been such a big part of our lives for three years and I'll be really sad to let it go. Watch me buy every bit of theme park memorabilia between now and then. I do need a Magic Kingdom Starbucks mug. That much I know. We're trying to plan a last Disney resort weekend and H's pass expires 2/1 and the rest of us expire 3/9, so between the expiration dates I'm hoping for a day date or two with C and one day of the Flower and Garden Festival with S because it's his favorite. Sigh. 
4. You know what drinking 100 ounces of water in a day (plus 40 ounces of Pellegrino) gets you? A lot of trips to the bathroom. I hit the bathroom before I started my meal and I'm already dancing. So much pee. You're welcome for that.
5. I read Bridge to Terebithia on the flight up this afternoon. I never got around to reading it when I was young and I knew it was sad but still I cried. I cried. I am always crying on planes, it seems.

Okay, I found it. Friday Five. 

Crock Pot ... and other things

You know you're going to be blown away by a post entitled "Crock Pot", right? Maybe I should add "and other things." There, that's better. Now I need to put other things in this post too.

Anywhosit-whatsit, my mom got me this crock pot warmer thing for Christmas and I was all, hmm, will I use this thing? Seems kind of gitschy. But it turns out YES.

It has this separate bowl thing that has a top and you can store that in the refrigerator with your leftovers (both times I used it for soup, but I think anything should work, I'll report back after I've used it with other things) and then when you need them, you drop the bowl into the crock pot warmer and plug it in. It's amazingly fast and tastes like you warmed it on the stove instead of the microwave. Two thumbs up.

Let's see, what else do I love?

These bluetooth headphones. I got them for Christmas and they are fantastic. The battery lasts forever and you can use them in a pinch to talk on the phone if you're in the middle of a walk when your mother calls to talk about your sister's pregnancy and bloodwork results.

This Karl Marx money bank. I just found it amusing, ordered it on a whim (because I needed a money bank anyhow) and yes, it makes me smile everytime I look at it and drop a few coins in. Good ol' Karl holding onto my money for me, for the betterment of society. Or some crap like that.

Books read: December 2015

I ended the year having read 145 books. Not too shabby, especially considering my slow start. So many good books this year. I made a Goodreads goal of 140 for 2016 just so I have a goal, but I don't worry too much about my reading goals these days. I'm reading. Here's what I read in December:

December

reread:

new: 

131. The Nature of the Beast - Louise Penny 

132. See Jane Run - Hannah Jayne

133. After You - Jojo Moyes

134. Cruel Beauty - Rosamund Hodge

135. Second Life - SJ Watson (this one was abandoned halfway through - I just couldn't.)

136. Gilded Ashes - Rosamund Hodge

137. The Husband's Secret - Liane Moriarty

138. The Perilous Sea - Sherry Thomas

139. The Immortal Heights - Sherry Thomas

Walk on Earth a Stranger - Rae Carson (finished from an earlier month so no number)

140. The Beautiful and the Cursed - Page Morgan

141. Career of Evil - Robert Galbraith

Fitness 2016

So this is something that is a little embarrassing to post this way, but apparently here is the only way to keep myself accountable (without snapping at my husband when he “helps”)

Here are my fitness resolutions, by way of backstory.

I have always been the “big girl” among my friends. I don’t eat too terribly and I don’t sit on my butt that much, so I just assumed that was my size. I hated it, but that’s what it was. Then in 2011 I made promises to myself that I would “get in shape”. I overhauled our diets and ran regularly and lost 42lbs. I fit in a size small. SMALL. In some (admittedly vanity) sizing, I fit a size FOUR pants. I hadn’t been that small since I was in seventh grade. And I didn’t look sick! I was healthy! I wasn’t not eating. I was healthy and I felt amazing.

But then 2012 I stopped running for some reason, and I didn’t get back into it. I ran once or twice every couple months but couldn’t make it a habit. I added white flour into our diets because Henry is the pickiest eater that ever picked.

Here it is 2016 and I’ve gained half the weight back. Granted, it could be worse. I have tried to take care of myself, but also, not. I’ve equated “self-care” with “cookies at bedtime”. I’ve gone from “life’s too short not to have a glass of wine” to “pass the bottle and also, where’s the gin?”

So while I’m not posting my starting weight here, X is my starting weight.

Here are my starting pictures (sigh).

(as an aside, I had Spencer take these pictures. “Mom, why am I taking pictures of you almost naked?” Let’s hope he doesn’t repeat that at school.)

For the month of January, I’m doing something along the lines of Whole30 (no I didn’t read the book, I found the website condescending and I didn’t want to see any more of their words on what they personally would “let” me eat.) No dairy, no grains, no sugar, no alcohol. The jury is still out on beans/peanut butter/soy, but I’m not actively eating it at this time. I’m not counting calories, but I’ve found I can only eat so much meat and I get bored. I think I need to be bored with food for awhile. I love food. I need to do more with the “food as fuel” and less “food as an experience” for a bit. Not for always, but for a bit.

I’m also doing 30 days of running. SOME sort of running. I’ve been starting out slow – Saturday was 1.6miles and a lot of it was walking, Sunday was 1.9 miles and even more of it was walking. But there’s intention there. I will get there. And a workout a day separate from running – I’ve got a 30-day crunches and push-up calendar and on the rest days I will do yoga.

And water. I am no good at water, so it’s on my list too. 64 ounces. I can do that, right?

My year goals are mostly related to running – six 5ks, two 10ks, 1 half. This will keep me running.

After January, I will reassess the food situation and possibly add in some grains and some cheese. Life is too short to go without cheese. But for 30 days, I can do it. 2016. Let's do this.