Looks like I fooled them!

How evil are you?

Gridlock

Originally posted April 13

When I was in college and living more than a half hour by highway from school, if I got on the interstate and it was too jammed, I'd likely turn around and go back home. Nowadays, I live exactly 20 miles from work, which is usually a 30-minute drive. Now, mind you, I never ever get to work on time. Ever. I think I feel worse about this than my bosses, as they never seem to care since I get my work done. Damn gridlock.

April Fool's:

originally posted April 13

Stacy has decided that the full month of April is all about the pranks. She and this guy in Atlanta have been pranking eachother back and forth ... so she decided to have him help her pull a prank on us -- but it backfired. Here's the scoop:

Stacy and Bob decide to have him email her friends: April, Other April and Suzanne; and say that when she comes home in May that he's going to ask her to move back to Atlanta. So he does send this email, but instead of just saying that he plans on asking her this, he outlines the joke and wants the girls to go along with him on a joke on Stacy where they go all for it and tell her she should move back with him.

Before this joke really gets started, Stacy calls April and tells her about the joke because she feels bad about pranking them. She's worried that they're going to get mad. April reassures her that they won't be mad and that she should go ahead with the joke. April then calls Other April and tells her of the confession (the girls already knew about the joke to begin with). So by the time April gets to work the next day it is decided that Other April and Suzanne will play that they are mad because they figured out the joke.

So on the same day Stacy tries to make plans with TJ, a guy who works with the girls (but not Stacy, she works with a different company now) for him to drive all the girls out to have lunch with her sometime next week. So he sends out the email, and Other April convinces him to tell Stacy that April is in, but Other April and Suzanne are out because they said they're mad about something. So then Stacy gets worried and starts emailing April and Bob (the one in Atlanta) trying to figure out why they're mad (thinking it's because of the joke). April and Bob become evasive, saying they don't know, haven't had time to check, blah blah blah.

April suggests to Stacy that if she thinks they are mad at her, she should email them and find out why. So she does, and Other April emails back that she's not having a problem with work, but that she found out some things that she's disappointed about and she doesn't want to talk about it by email. And Stacy says, "with me?" and Other April says yes, but she's not going to talk about it on the computer.

So this freaks Stacy out big time. Her fears have come true -- she made her friends mad with this silly joke about her moving back to Atlanta with Bob, whom she just met a month ago. She's pacing her office, fighting back the tears, when the email comes back from Other April:

I'm disappointed in you ... for falling for it! April Fool's!

Castles and Princesses:

Originally posted on April 12

Shell and I went out to Target last night after making wedding favors to get more candy for the wedding favors (who knew these things were going to take so many bags of candy? We've done 25 bags of candy and we still have more to make!) and we ended up walking through the baby clothes. I don't think I needed to do that. Everyone I know (within reason) is getting married, or having kids (even though some of them haven't told their parents about said kids ... you know who you are) and I feel like I'm just sitting here, stagnant. I think I'm becoming resentful, and I don't know what to do about that. I'm really happy, most of the time. We have a great relationship, we have a house and a dog and stable jobs (although we'd really like him to find a better job) and everything generally is wonderful. But I long for my life to move on.

I've stopped talking about marriage with him. We used to talk about it all the time, and make plans and decisions and everything in everyday conversation. We'd walk by a fancy car and he'd say, "Do you want to use one of those instead of a limo?" or we'd be talking over lunch about Shelley's wedding colors and he'd say, "What colors did you want to use?" We'd be in Wal-Mart and I'd say, "I think I want [these people] in the wedding party instead of [this person]," and he'd talk about who could be on his side.

I thought maybe it was the money. His cousin got a big ring, and I know he feels the pressure to upstage that (the husband is his best friend), but really I don't care as much about that. I'd like a big ring, of course, just like any girl. But it doesn't have to be right now. Right now it's more important to me that we get married and move on with our lives. The ring can always come later, right? So I told him so. And he was not receptive. I actually found the conversation stilted, one-sided and hostile. So I dropped that conversation too.

But there's all this talking and no movement. I can't do it anymore. So I've resolved to not talk about our wedding. Period. I'll talk with my girlfriends at work, and with Shelley, but he's cut off from conversation about it. Until it actually happens I've given up hoping it will. Maybe then I won't be so resentful.

Product Placement:

Originally posted April 12:

I've decided to use this forum for good: I'm promoting my new favorite personal hygiene product: the Crest Spin Brush. It's fantastic! Like going to the dentist every day, but without the drilling or the scraping or the guilt for not flossing. Seriously! I've converted all of my friends who weren't already addicted (except Suzanne; she likes the Oral B one because the head is smaller and she has sensitive gums ... now don't read anything dirty into that). But for $5 you get a fantabulous experience! Try one today!

Reflective like a carnival mirror:

Originally posted April 12:

So you know how most people say, "when you look back you'll forget all the bad and just remember the good?" Well, I have to say in hindsight I'm pessimistic as hell. I don't remember the good times right away. The fights, the loneliness, the break-ups, the anger, the daydreams of freedom -- I have a firm grasp on those memories. ... it's not until I find pictures, or letters crammed between the pages of a forgotten book that I am reminded that not everything about my past was black. There were flashes of good in there too, even happiness. I need to be reminded of this every now and again.

Slap my sweet ass and call me Sally:

Originally posted April 10:

So it is a long running idea that I hate hot sauces. Hate em. And it stems from the fact that I hate spicy foods. I just cant eat them they make my mouth uncomfortable. So Ive been going to Tiajuana Flats with the folks from work (Chuck calls it Fiesta time) and then Christen and I go every once in awhile, and I have started trying the hot sauces. Now, Im still a complete wuss at them; I have to let you know that up front. I tried Endorphine Rush (and ate all my tomatoes trying to get rid of the burn) and Don't be a Chicken Shit (not too bad) and one with pecans it it (terrible). But my favorite, and the one I get every time is Slap my Sweet Ass and Call Me Sally. It reminds me of Thai sweet chili sauce. Mmmm. So let it be known that, although a wuss, I have tried and liked a few hot sauces. Dont say I never attempted to branch out.