Running thin

I was talking to my coworker this morning about my book clubs, and I mentioned that I had one tonight that I have read the book for but the one next week that is at my house I hadn’t. Then I mentioned a kids’ birthday party that we are going to tomorrow, and she told me I seemed to be stretching myself a little thin. “You have two small boys! Aren’t they already running you ragged without all that other stuff?”

Hmm.

I know that most people when I tell them how much I do usually say that, but in my life I don’t really feel that way. I work about 45 hours a week, and am gone FOR work about 60 hours a week minimum, sometimes more. I have two IRL book clubs and two online that I participate in sometimes. I am on social media far too much, I acknowledge. I also participate in several exchanges online (scarf exchange, monthly CDP exchanges, etc). I cook all meals for my family, and do about 40% of the around-the-house chores (I fully acknowledge my husband does more of this). Occasionally (and trying for more) I exercise also.

I also have two high-energy, running, screaming, jumping make-me-run-for-the-hills boys.

So when I wonder why I had to start taking a sleeping aide this week because I was having bouts of insomnia and I had some pretty serious stress-related stomach issues this week, it occurs to me that maybe I should slow down a little. I don’t always feel stressed, but I always feel a little frazzled and angry. I don’t spend as much time with my husband as I should, and I have far too short of a fuse with my kids.

I don’t plan on giving up any of my activities. When I’m being honest with myself I know that I’m a better wife and mother when I have these things of my own. However, in the spirit of Ginger’s new resolution (not NY, just regular ole great resolution) I’m going to remind myself daily of the things I have to be thankful. I’m going to TRY very hard to spend better time with my kids. Not more, just better. Spencer can “help” me exercise and do jumping jacks with me. Henry can tell me what color his Froot Loops are (note: still doesn’t know his colors, except pink and white. This is normal, right?) I’m going to breathe. Relax. And remember that I am lucky and shouldn’t be this stressed.





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